Return Your Library Books In Iowa or Face Jail... YAY IOWA!!

Pictured: Wait, is that shirt tie-dye?

Christopher Anspach, 28, served 10 days in jail plus a fine for not returning library books from the Newton Public Library in Newton, Iowa.  The gentleman was given multiple chances to return the books and other materials, worth around $770, before the police were contacted.

No update as to whether he was laughed at so hard by the other inmates that he was physically blasted from his cell by the force of sound alone and further charged with escaping from jail via being a dumbass.  Return your damn library books, people!

thesmokinggun via huffpost

Crying Baby's Mama Goes to Court

An Atlanta mother who was asked to leave a library because of a crying baby is facing trial on obstruction of a police officer.  The incident happened when the mother was asked to leave a Dekalb County library because her child was being too loud.  As she left, she allegedly became irate and began cursing in front of children which lead to her being arrested.  If convicted, she faces a 12 month jail sentence. Atlanta Journal-Constitution

Do I believe a mother was asked to leave a library because of a crying baby?  Yeah, I have done it myself.  Do I believe the mother would become upset?  Yeah, I have faced that dragon before.  What I cannot believe is that the police would become involved if this was a simple screaming match.  I can only assume someone went all nuts somewhere in this but I can not speculate how.  I will assume Facebook was somehow involved, however. 

Let me 'splain.  No, too long, let me sum up.  The only parents with unruly or overly loud children I have ever asked to leave the library where the parents that were not watching their children.  I have bent over backwards for a single mom trying to fill out job applications, dads that need to get in and out with a cart of DVDs, and new parents that just do not quite know how grandma gets the rugrat to calm down so quickly.  But the parents that refuse to parent, the ones that sit on Facebook while Junior unplugs equipment like an IT tech and checks every room in the library for an echo factor.... They do not last long.  

I am not saying that this was the case with the DeKalb County lady.  I am just saying I understand.

Update: Mom gives her side which contradicts police report. Also, the title of this story is incorrect, the baby was only laughing, not crying. Atlanta Journal-Constitution

Coloring Book Drug Smugglin': Takes Me Back to Preschool

That ain't yellow dye #5

Three inmates and two civilians are facing charges when it was found they were smuggling the drug Suboxone  pasted onto coloring book pages into the Cape May County Correctional Center.  After following a tip, officers began scanning the jail's mail until they found the coloring pages.  

Kinda puts all those kids running around the Children's Department into perspective, huh?  Remember, the next time a toddler gives you a drawing outside the lines, you get that down to the boys in the crime lab, STAT.  Or I guess you could lick the paper and see if you catch a buzz.  More likely you will catch flu, but whatevs.  That's the price you pay for fast livin'.  Remember, what happens in the play area, stays in the play area.

MSNBC via Geekologie